Archive for May, 2006

Wednesday One-liners Make Me Sick

Black lady: I don’t eat fried food. Grease is the enemy. When I was pregnant with my daughter, I wanted fried food all the time. This one day, I left work to go eat some fried fish, and I ate it. And I stayed there. And you know what happened? The grease came up and the fish stayed down. –Precious Nails, 94th & 3rd Suit #1 to suit #2: We can do whatever you want today. I just don’t like the stuff you make me do that makes me throw up. –AJ Maxwell’s, 48th & 6th Overheard by: their waitress

Lion Alert Level: Yellow

Little girl, loudly: ROAR!
Little girl’s dad: Leslie, stop it, you’re scaring the people.
Little girl, quietly: Roar…
Little girl’s dad: Very nice Les, scare them subtly. –Payless, 225th & Broadway Overheard by: NARS

The Next Marketing Trend: Playing Hard to Get

Orthodox woman, holding bag of almond meal: What do you mean it’s not kosher?
Grocer person: Well, if it doesn’t have a kosher symbol I would assume that means that it isn’t kosher.
Woman: Does it have a kosher symbol?
Grocer, politely: You have the bag in your hand, miss. Does it have a kosher symbol?
Woman: No it doesn’t. Why do you not carry kosher almond meal? I have been buying this for years and now you tell me it’s not kosher.
Grocer: I can only guess that the reason we don’t carry it is that then people like you would shop here. –Trader Joe’s, Union Square Overheard by: matthew andrew pryatel