Archive for October, 2006

More Detail Then?

College girl: My friend told me that if you join the Peace Corps, you’ve got to learn to skin and gut animals. Even if you are a vegetarian!
Redneck guy: I’ve gutted hundreds of animals.
College girl: I’m morally opposed to gutting animals. I only want to see chicken in Saran Wrap at the grocery store.
Redneck guy: I’ve gutted about 800 chickens, 200 ducks, 200 deer.
College girl: Please. I don’t want to hear about your animal gutting history any more than you want to hear about my sexual history. –Williamsburg Overheard by: Shy

Fucking Scoliosis Brace

Girl #1, looking at The L Word: God, I wish I was that girl, and could make out with girls.
Girl #2: Why don’t you make out with girls now?
Girl #1: I can’t! This body is straight! –Virgin Megastore, Times Square Overheard by: Angie

Apple’s Next Anti-PC Marketing Campaign Takes Shape

Office thug #1: Yo, Windows is, like, mad-retarded!
Office thug #2: Say what?
Office thug #1: I said Windows is bullshit, man.
Office thug #2: Man, I been telling you that shit for years. My G5 is way better than whatever computer you got.
Office thug #1: Nigga, my laptop has AIDS! –52nd St & Madison

‘Hey, Big Titty Mama!’: Reminiscences of a Life in New York

Girl #1: Somebody in a limo yelled something obscene at me today, but I couldn’t hear them because I had my iPod on.
Girl #2: Yeah, you should always have your iPod on so you can’t hear the terrible things people shout at you.
Girl #1: But then I wouldn’t have any material for my memoirs! –Brooklyn-bound Q train Overheard by: Monia Paford