Archive for 2006

Maybe She Just Smoked Too Much

Teen girl #1: Here comes Peter Cottontail. . .
Teen girl #2: Hopping up the bunny trail!
Teen girl #1: What the hell? It’s down the bunny trail, you idiot!
Teen girl #2: How am I supposed to know? I was MJ’ed when I was younger.
Teen girl #1: MJ’ed?
Teen girl #2: Yeah, you know, Michael Jacksoned…
Teen girl #1: They molested you?!
Teen girl #2: Yes, they molested me and that’s why I don’t know the words to Peter Cottontail… whorebag. –M96 bus Overheard by: TrEeShA

Does Psycho Killer Start with P?

Girl: I’m thinking of an animal that starts with a P.
Guy: Porcupine?
Girl: No. Wait, are those big smears of blood all over that subway map?
Guy: I think they’re paint.
Girl: They’re totally blood.
Guy: [looks harder] Yeah, you’re totally right… Penguin?
Girl: Nope! –1 train Overheard by: djlindee

Shallow Grave

Girl #1: So I think he died, right there in his place on 96th Street.
Girl #2: How do you know?
Girl #1: We were talking on the phone and then, nothing.
Girl #2: Was it hard for you?
Girl #1: Oh, I don’t care. –F train Overheard by: NJM

Her Brother Had an Edible Complex

Girl: I’m looking for a play for school.
Bookseller: What’s the name?
Girl: Antigen.
Bookseller: You mean Antigone?
Girl: What’s the difference?
Bookseller: One’s a play about a girl and her dead brother, and the other is a play that hasn’t been written yet about carbohydrates and proteins.
Girl: Oh. The dead one, then. –Barnes & Noble, Court St.