Archive for 2006

Calista Flockhart Must Feel So Forgotten

Chick #1: Well, no, you look better now, but you were never that skinny, I mean, I never looked at you like “she needs a sandwich”, like…
Chick #2: No, but I haven’t gained any weight, really; my clothes still fit.
Chick #1: But you were never grotesque, like what’s her name.
Chick #2: Nicole Ritchie.
Chick #1: Yeah. –55th & 8th Overheard by: Duncan Pflaster

He’s Practically in Jersey

Annoucement: Attention transit police. Please respond. There is a passenger harrassing peeople on the southbound platform. Wait 30 seconds… Announcement repeats three times. Guy on platform takes off his headphones. Headphone guy: Wait — What was that about the harrassing? Other guy on platform: Oh, you don’t have to worry — he’s on the southbound platform. Headphone guy [puts his headphones on again]: Cool. –18th St 1/9 stop, northbound platform Overheard by: diana

I’m About to Anticlimax

Guy #1 eating an ice cream cone: Look at these babes.
Guy #2 eating an ice cream cone: Look at these jugs.
Guy #1: Look at these bombs.
Guy #2: Holy shit! Russian Scuds!
Guy #1: Look at these torpedos!
Guy #2: Look at these fun bags!
Guy #1: Oh yeah! Oh yeah! What a babe!
Guy #2: Yeah, but her friend has to do something with that can. –Broadway & 22nd Overheard by: Eric Wenstrom

Just Take It Back to Sears

Teen boy #1: So Charlie puked this morning!
Teen boy #2: What?
Teen boy #1: Yeah! He was so fucking drunk that he puked in the fridge this morning.
Teen boy #2: No shit!
Teen boy #1: Seriously. And fucking Dylan, he fucking sprayed it all over the fucking place. It was fucking nasty, man. –M86 bus Overheard by: Ally