Archive for 2006

She Can’t See Because of Her Hood

Girl on cell: I’m on 42nd, where are you? Yeah, the place is on 46th. Where are you again? No, I will not walk down to 33rd just to meet your cunty face and walk with you to 46th…meet me here. Just go straight! You’re not blind, you fucking liar…oh, Christ, there is no such thing as stress blindness…I hope you get hit by a car. –42nd & 7th Overheard by: Ria Vergara

New Ways to Get Out of Sex

Girl #1: But I wasn’t laughing at him, I was laughing at his little white penis in a black condom.
Girl #2: Yeah. Chris’s penis is crooked, and I told him he could never wear one of those yellow banana-flavored condoms, because I might forget I was blowing him and think I was eating a banana.
Girl #1: You’re an idiot. –2nd Ave & 10th Street Overheard by: Alia Lesoix

Then You Might Actually Stay Upright

Girl in bathroom: Well, my friends live out here, but I’m from Manhattan, so I asked them what I should wear and they said this place was really casual. So I asked if I could at least wear heels..and they said no…but I can’t drink in sneakers! –Astoria Beer Garden Overheard by: melissa

Weigh Two Long

Scrabble girl: “Gooeesay” is so not a word.
Scrabble guy: That’s “guise.”
Scrabble girl: Ha! Well, smart guy, you spelled it wrong. “Guys” is spelled G-U-Y-S.
Scrabble guy: Are you serious?
Scrabble girl: Sorry, there’s no way I’m letting you get away with that after you wouldn’t give me any points for “Steve.”
Scrabble guy: How long have we been dating? –Central Park Overheard by: Uncle Joe