Archive for 2006

Biggie: At Last, Someone Understands my Message!

Big white dyke: You know what we should do? We should call Hugh and all our slutty friends. They could all come over and get drunk, and we’d put on some rap.
Big black dyke: What?
Big white dyke: No, seriously, I was at my friends’ party and we put on a Biggie Smalls album. Fifteen minutes later it was the sleaziest party I’ve ever been to.

–Brooklyn bound Q

Overheard by: Benjamin

Harlot, 1995-2000: I Was a Team Player Skilled in Oral Communication with Customers

Acting student, performing a scene: You cheated on me! You harlot!
Acting professor: No, no! Now would you say ‘harlot?’ If someone called me a harlot I’d say ‘Oh thank you so much!’ You’d say you mother-fucking bitch, you whore, you slut! ‘Harlot’ sounds beautiful, I’d put it on my resume!

–Fordham University, Lincoln Center

Overheard by: team jeffrey

One Grade Below F

Ghetto boyfriend: You better shut the fuck up unless you want to get your ass whipped in front of all these White people!
Ghetto girlfriend goes to the next car.
Ghetto boyfriend
: But I’m still a G!

–F train