Archive for 2006

Who Doesn’t Know Their Address?

Girl #1: Why you holding yo’ nose? We all know it smells like piss in here.
Girl #2: I know it smells like piss, I just don’ wanna pick anything else up into my lungs.
Girl #1: You jus’ wiling cause of the piss smell.
Girl #2: Please, the elevator in my building smells like piss. In fact, in my building, I can tell you the apartment number of who pissed in the elevator. –Fordham Metro-North station elevator

When You’re Family, You’re in There

Dude: So you gonna give me some fuckin’ money? Give me some fuckin money! I don’t have two quarters to rub together; I can’t
even call my wife. Give me some fuckin’ money!
Lawyer man: I’m not going to give you any money.
Dude: Give me some fuckin’ money! You are my sister! I have no money!
Woman: I’m not giving you any money when you are acting like a criminal.
Restaurant guy: Sir, you need to calm down or I will have to call the police.
Dude: Don’t tell me what to fucking do. I just got out of Rikers Island!
Restaurant guy: Well sir, do you want to go back there? You need to leave or take the conversation outside. –Pasta Lovers, Kew Gardens Overheard by: Amanda