Archive for 2006

Correct Answer: Sommelier

Crazy lady: Does anyone know how to get to the fucking G train? I need to get to a fucking job interview at 6!
Man #1: I swear it’s really not like this all the time.
Woman: What kind of job is she going for?
Man #2: I hope it’s not customer service. Man #3: Hey baby, just follow me. I’m getting on the G right now.
Crazy lady: Go suck a dead dog’s dick.
Man #3: So what’s that taste like?
Crazy lady: A dead dog’s dick. –4 train

He’s Still Bummed Because of It

Hobo: If anyone messes with you in the office, just take the palm of your hand an shove it into his nose. Once he messes with you he ain’t Jerry from accounting no more; he’s an assailant and the rest of the office will respect and fear you.
Woman: How did your last office job work out? –L train Overheard by: JDS

When Cliches Backfire

Black man: Why’d you do that? Throwing that money at me. You’re stupid. Here, give it to me…You’re stupid. Why did you throw the money at me?
Cashier guy: I set it down! I didn’t throw it.
Black man: You’re stupid!
Manager guy: Why do you have to make it personal?
Black man: Mind your own business. –Citgo, Long Island City