Archive for 2006

The Next Episode of Everybody Hates Chris

Kid: Mama! Can I get these chips?
Woman: Uh-uh! That shit is a dollar! That means no change! Put it back! [Turns to friend] I can’t believe these damn kids with my fuckin’ money! I work eight days a week! And I ain’t suckin’ no dick!
Friend: Mmm-hm.

–145th St & Edgecombe Ave

Overheard by: Sam

Sorry, No, My Parents Are Raising Me Rational

Kindergarten girl #1: Wow! Look at all those big trophies!
Kindergarten girl #2: Those ain’t trophies. There’s dead people there. Yeah, you know — you go to church, you pray, and they put the dead person in the box, and they put the box in there. Don’t you go to church?

–On school bus passing a cemetery, Queens