Archive for 2007

Situational Ethics

Girl #1: Hey, your tag is still on your sweatshirt.
Girl #2: I know. I’m thinking about returning it.
Girl #3, a minute later: Hey, your tag is still on your sweatshirt.
Girl #2: I know! I’m hip hop.

–Williamsburg

Almost the Platonic Archetype

Chick #1 perusing lunch specials: God, that is so guh-ross!
Chick #2: What now?
Chick #1: That bloody roast beef thing right there… All of that red meat… It’s the flesh of animals! It’s so cruel and it makes me sick. I’m a total vegan these days.
Chick #2: Huh. Wait, didn’t you have a bacon and egg sandwich this morning?
Chick #1, haughtily: Yeah, but that’s not the actual flesh of any animal, now is it?
Chick #2: Wow. You are the first real idiot I’ve ever met.

–Cafe Europa, 6th Ave

Overheard by: BellaStella

He’s Cheating on Me with Joe

College girl #1: I found out Mike’s cheating on me. I’m, like, totally devastated.
College girl #2: Ugh. What an asshole. How’d you find out?
College girl #1: Joe told me last week after we hooked up.
College girl #2: Ugh… Mike is such a jerk…

–Macy’s

Overheard by: Merlyn

Glad We Got That Out of the Way

Chinese mother holding plate of free rice: Do you like rice, girls?
Little girls: Of course we like rice, we’re Chinese!
Chinese mother: I know you’re Chinese. I am Chinese, too.

–Columbus Circle

Overheard by: Non-Chinese Rice-Lover