Archive for 2007

I’m Much Better Now, Though

Dirty Casanova: Yeah, but I always have fun over at First Ave. The other day I saw this crackhead running around naked in front of the club.
Cute girl: He must’ve been freezing.
Dirty Casanova: Yeah, I know what that’s like… Not running naked in the cold, but being addicted to crack.

–G train, Metropolitan stop

Overheard by: Jason Hamlin

Your Best Option Is Just to Get Fat and Buy the Clothes

Teen #1: Sometimes I fantasize about having a baby with him just so I could be attached to him forever. In fact, last night I was looking on the Internet for when your most fertile days are… And mine is today.
Teen #2, laughing: Well, I definitely don’t ever want to get pregnant. Those nasty maternity clothes… Ew.
Teen #1: What?! I like the maternity clothes better than regular clothes!
Teen #2: Nah, fuck maternity!

–Port Authority Bus Terminal