Archive for 2007

Please Do It on the Coat

Drunk hipster #1: Hey, are you okay?
Drunk hipster #2, looking at girl in Houndstooth pattern coat: Yeah, I just didn’t realize how drunk I was until I started staring at that girl’s coat, and now I think I’m gonna throw up.

–Matchless Bar, Greenpoint

Overheard by: Aria Grillo

Someone’s Been Watching Too Many Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parades

Queer #1: He just got so fat, like, he didn’t even care anymore. It was disgusting.
Queer #2: Well, it happens when you get older. I’ll never let myself get fat. Will you?
Queer #1: Never!
Queer #2: Yes, you will. You’ll be like a big fat balloon with two fat little arms sticking out, barely able to hold onto the bottle of Jack Daniels you’ll be guzzling.

–A train, 86th St

Frankly, She’s My Role Model

Columbia girl #1: His parents invited me out to Greenwich this weekend, so I took time off from my internship and was all ready to go…
Columbia girl #2: You’re not going to go?
Columbia girl #1: Well, no. You know that rash I had on my right boob? It’s back.
Columbia girl #2: No way!
Columbia girl #1: Seriously. You’re not getting that thing near a bikini with my future mother-in-law anywhere nearby. She sniffs stuff like that out in no time. Like a bloodhound.

–E 74th St & Park