Archive for 2007

West Cider Story

Dude #1: Why is New York called the ‘Big Apple’? Maybe it’s if you put together the five boroughs on a map, it looks like a very big apple.
Dude #2: Yes, obviously! What else did you think it could have been?

–W 4th St & MacDougal

Overheard by: V

Oh, Watch Out for That Homeless Guy

Dude #1: So, she lied to her parents about what third world country she went to?
Dude #2: Yeah, I guess so.
Dude #1: Wait, where did she really go?
Dude #2: I don’t know — Thailand, Vietnam or Kenya… Somewhere with poor people.
Dude #1: Damn.

–A train

Someone Has to Set Our Gender Back

College girl #1: Yeah, she’s afraid to go out anywhere. She always thinks she’s going to get raped.
College girl #2: I don’t understand the big deal about rape. If it happened to me I’d be like, ‘Oh, well, it was bound to happen.’
College girl #3: Haha, you’d probably like it.
College girl #2, nodding: Yeah, I would.

–Elevator in apartment building

Overheard by: Neil

You Can Come to the Front If I Can Pick the Kids

Ragged old black guy with wad of cash in hand, teasing: You gonna let me cut the line, right?
Clerk: Please get on the end of the line.
Ragged old black guy: I’ma buy me that 250-dollar Blue Label up there. You gonna let me get on the front of this line, right?
Clerk: [Ignores him.]
Ragged old black guy: 250 dollars for Blue Label for me to get drunk and run over some kids!

–Liquor store, 23rd & Park

Overheard by: Baby G