Archive for 2007

I Hope No Men Find Out How Foul Women Can Be

Female yuppie #1: … And it was smeared all over the walls of the stall!
Female yuppie #2: Oh my god, that is so disgusting.
Female yuppie #1: Yeah, I can’t believe someone would do that at work.
Female yuppie #2: I can’t believe someone would do that ever!

–South-bound G train

Overheard by: Kevin

You Go Ahead and Feel Bad, Though

Father: They’re really promoting Paul McCartney at Starbucks.
Tween son: One of my friends said it sucks that John Lennon was shot instead of Paul McCartney. I felt bad when he said it.
Father: That’s a horrible thing to say… But your friend was right.

–Starbucks, 8th St

Fuck the Contest. I’m Joining That Gym!

Workout girl #1: It feels so sticky when I put it on my lips.
Workout girl #2: That’s why you don’t stick your fingers all the way inside it.

–Synergy Gym, Astoria

Overheard by: Wog

Headline by: Rocks N Socks

Runners-Up:
· “How to Eat a Bowl Of Ice Cream Without a Spoon” – Karl

· “Life Without a Toilet Plunger…” – Jackster
· “Oh Cum On!” – Mike
· “The Rim Is All You Need…” – Steph
· “Winnie The Pooh Had The Same Problem With His Honeypot” – Sticky Thump


Click here to see the new Headline Contest

Wednesday One-Liners, As Seen in Playbill

Twenty-ish girl exiting theater: Ugh… It’s like getting out of prison…

–Stage door for Mary Poppins, 41st St

Angry old lady: You shouldn’t have to be distracted by all these ideas when you’re watching a play.

Cymbeline, BAM

Overheard by: Harriet Vane

Mother to child eating pizza: Eat your cereal! Do you know why I said, ‘Eat your cereal’? Because it’s a line in Mommy’s play.

–105th & Broadway

Shocked lady fanning herself after first act of Spring Awakening: Well, that certainly wasn’t Cats.

–O’Neill Theater

Overheard by: sjp

Girl on cell: Wait, she quit her job to come see the show?

–Rush line for Spring Awakening

Overheard by: hope she gets tickets

Blue-haired person to another: I didn’t care for it, but the Asians will love it!

Sweet Charity showing, Al Hirschfeld Theatre

Overheard by: Robert