Archive for 2007

How Language Evolves

Eight-year-old girl: Why you gotta be yap-yap-yapping all the time on your phone?
15-year-old sister: Shut up! You crazy!
Eight-year-old: Oh, yeah? You a como!
15-year-old sister: What the hell is a ‘como’? That’s not even a word!
Eight-year-old: Yes it is! ‘Co-’ like ‘cold,’ and ‘mo-’ like ‘mole,’ on your face!
15-year-old sister: Crazy…
Eight-year-old: You a como. I ain’t crazy [gives sister the finger].

–Bx15 bus

Sherry: Did Ratatouille Mean Nothing to You?

Guy #1: It may take a few tries, but it works — you can flush them down the toilet.
Guy #2: I didn’t think you could flush something, y’know — solid. Don’t they jam up the toilet?
Guy #1: Nope. I guess they’re not big enough, or maybe I’ve been lucky, but I’ve never had a problem.
Guy #2: If you’re going to kill them anyway, I don’t see why you have those live traps.
Guy #1: Sherry won’t let me get regular traps, so I don’t tell her I’m flushing the mice, and everything’s cool. I just tell her I’m setting them loose outside.

–6 train, 23rd & Park

Are You Sure

Child: Tia Jeanette, did you know that the tourist-ists brought down the twin towers?
Tia Jeanette: No, no, no, Anthony, it was the terror-ist.
Child: Ohhh…

–Ground Zero