Archive for 2007

Sherry: Did Ratatouille Mean Nothing to You?

Guy #1: It may take a few tries, but it works — you can flush them down the toilet.
Guy #2: I didn’t think you could flush something, y’know — solid. Don’t they jam up the toilet?
Guy #1: Nope. I guess they’re not big enough, or maybe I’ve been lucky, but I’ve never had a problem.
Guy #2: If you’re going to kill them anyway, I don’t see why you have those live traps.
Guy #1: Sherry won’t let me get regular traps, so I don’t tell her I’m flushing the mice, and everything’s cool. I just tell her I’m setting them loose outside.

–6 train, 23rd & Park

Are You Sure

Child: Tia Jeanette, did you know that the tourist-ists brought down the twin towers?
Tia Jeanette: No, no, no, Anthony, it was the terror-ist.
Child: Ohhh…

–Ground Zero

Thanks, Dad.

45-year-old man: … And since I’m on my way to a business meeting, this drink I just bought you is tax deductible.
College girl: Well, that’s nice, I guess.
45-year-old man: Yeah, you’ve got a big butt and you’re tax deductible. That’s how I like them.

–Coffee Shop Bar, 14th St

Headline by: Snark Sloper

· “Accountant Pickup Line #65337-2366-26637-1″ – Works For Me

· “Baby Got Back. — Cf, Form 1040 Schedule C Line 27″ – chris
· “Monica Lewinsky
: This Sounds Familiar…” – D. Kareem

· “Until She Capital Gains All That Weight” – Vasyl

Click here to see the new Headline Contest