…Don't You Think?

Friend #1: Oh! We should all ride our bikes to Red Hook, check out the ball field, get Swedish meatballs at Ikea and hang out at the flea market.
Friend #2:: I… can't… do that.
Friend #1: Why? Oh, do you not own a bike?
Friend #2: No, I don't. And… I also don't know how to ride a bike.
Friend #1: What? And you live in Williamsburg?
Friend #3: Hey, it's ironic.

–South Street Seaport

Wednesday One-Liners Write Off Anal-Bleaching As a Work Expense

Blonde girl to guy friend: I've never done real porn before. What's it like?

–Fordham University Lincoln Center

Loud, long-haired, seemingly-straight white guy: So I wanna do a promo for the "hard-on" part!

–15th St & 5th Ave

Overheard by: Flyin' Thing

Sorostitute at nearby table: So I said, 'if there's gonna be sex, take out the camera.'

–Brooklyn

Overheard by: Ladle

Man, coming out of Peep World: Blu-Ray would of course make the money shot better… Not that I would know.

–33rd St

Overheard by: Deep Tech