Overheard In New York

Archive for February, 2008

I Wrote about This on my Application Essay

Dude #1, burping loudly: I know you’re gassy if you have to fart a lot, but what are you if you have to burp a lot?
Dude #2: Same thing, in the opposite direction.

–Columbia University

Overheard by: Wiley Willis

No — And for Religious Reasons

Hipster #1: Have we had the bar mitzvah conversation yet?
Hipster #2: I thought you were a Mexican?
Hipster #1: I’m Brazilian. And Jewish.
Hipster #2: Are you fucking with me?

–Williamsburg

Sometimes We Even Have Sex

Dude #1: Lots of people tell me I’m the gayest straight man they know.
Dude #2: Mmmm… No, I know a gayer straight guy than you.

–F station, Bergen St

Overheard by: Rose Fox

Americans and Their Incomprehensible English

Tall foreign model #1: … And we nicknamed each other’s, you know, junk…
Tall foreign model #2: Really? What does he call yours?
Tall foreign model #1: He keeps calling it ‘Gina’ — I don’t get why.
Tall foreign model #2: Huh.

–12th & 4th

Hey, I Didn’t Vote for Him

Loud woman: That nigga stupid!
Friend: You right.
Loud woman: Nah, he worse than stupid. That nigga retarded! Re-tar-ded!
Friend: He didn’t even get good grades in college!

–F train

… Not to Mention Non-Jews

Hipster #1: So, everybody is moving to Park Slope.
Hipster #2: Who’s everybody?
Hipster #1: I don’t know… Jews…

–Williamsburg, Brooklyn

Overheard by: Emily