Archive for June, 2008

I Find Starvation Heightens His T-Ball Game

Girl #1: Look at these pictures.
(girl #2 starts to look at pictures)
Girl #2
: Oh look, my son looks like one of those… uhhh… hmmm…? I forgot what they are called.

Girl #1: A hungry child?
Girl #2: Yeaaaah, like one of those kids from a third world country.

–Buhre Avenue, Bronx

Overheard by: DaILList4Ever

The Invisible Hand Behind Subway “Accidents”

Wall Street guy #1: So I was watching A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila and my son asked: “Dad, what’s a lesbian?” I mean, I wish I could tell him about it when he’s ready.
Wall Street guy #2: Yeah, so anyway. They have these only boys and only girls birthday parties for the little kids down at Fire Island…
Wall Street guy #1: So you think the parties turn them into lesbians?
Wall Street guy #2: No, I’m just trying to segue into talking about something other than… (looks around train suspiciously) lesbians.

–Downtown 6 Train

Your Neck Gets Stiff Keeping Your Nose in the Air

Lady: Yeah, I mean I’m looking for something that is a fit for me. Ya know, you’re either an East Side girl or a West Side girl… there’s really no in-between.
Real estate agent: Right, right, I understand. That’s why I’m here.
Lady: Because you know, I don’t want to be surrounded by frat bros and their yoga moms.
Real estate: Understandable, I wouldn’t subject anyone to that.

–Starbucks, 57th & Lexington

Overheard by: trying to get caffeine fix