Kid to dad: Order a Margarita so I can have some.
Dad to kid: I don't drink alcohol and you are nine years old!
–Bar, Montegue Street, Brooklyn
Overheard by: hungry law student
Archive for November, 2008
Just Like the Old Song Goes
Guy #1: I was totally eyefucking her.
Guy #2: Yeah, you were eyefucking her from here to Puerto Rico.
Guy #1: Yeah, I was.
–6th Ave & 56th St
Overheard by: Chloe
Mamma Mia, That's a Spicy Matzoh Ball!
Guy #1: You must be Italian.
Guy #2: Uh…no, I'm Jewish.
Guy #1: Are you sure? You really look Italian.
Guy #2: Of course I'm sure. What do I have to do to prove it to you?
Guy #3: I don't like where this is going.
–6 Train
Overheard by: Jenya
Except Muslims, of Course
Cute teenage girl: Ma, what's with that Pope? Isn't he a pedophile or something?
Mother: This is New York, honey. We take everybody.
–21st St & 5th Ave
Leave Hillary Alone, People.
Flagrantly homosexual Hispanic drag queen: So, I was like, lookin', and I realized what we been hearin' is true! And damnnnn, he looked hot.
Equally homosexual drag queen who unfortunately retained many masculine characteristics: What?! She's a man now?!
–Outside Penn Station
Overheard by: Kat
We'll Be Too Busy Experimenting with Oral Sex
Eight-year-old girl: Well, we could go to a movie for a date!
Mother: I don't know about that…
Eight-year-old girl (seriously): It's not like we're going to share popcorn!
–Upper West Side
Overheard by: redefining childhood sweethearts
Which May Explain Why I'm Failing Seven Classes
Guy: Do you know what time it is?
Girl: No, I forgot my watch. But it doesn't matter, I don't really know how to tell time anyway.
–Fordham University, Rose Hill Campus
Captain Jack Sparrow Has Pirates Who Do That
Guy on date: Everything in my kitchen is from Crate and Barrel.
Girl on date: Oh.
Guy: My cups, my saucers, my plates, I have an espresso machine…
Girl: Wow.
Guy: Yeah, but I haven't mopped the floor in over a month.
–Broadway & Houston
As Much So As Anything at the MoMA
19-year-old kid, examining stack of legal-sized paper with type on it in a stairwell corner area: It's art.
19-year-old friend: It's art?
19-year-old kid: I guess.
–Whitney Museum, Biennial Exhibit
Overheard by: Amanda
She Duels Like Yoda
Guy to woman with baby strapped to her chest: Your baby looks like a little Yoda.
Woman: That's what my husband said.
Husband: No, I said she looks like Obi-Wan.
–Path b/w Christopher & 9th
Overheard by: Brwnman