Archive for 2008

I Brought My Paddle!

Passenger #1: I’m gonna be riding in the Five Boro Bike Tour, but I haven’t begun training yet. If I don’t train, my legs will be fine but my ass will be sore. My ass isn’t ready for that long a ride.
Passenger #2: I think Jake* would love to help train your ass for the ride!

–4 train

Overheard by: Hobo Whisperer

From R.L. Stevenson’s Treasure Trail Island

Girl #1: How often do you get wet?
Girl #2: Oh my god, we’re in public!
Girl #1: Well, I was just wondering, because everybody back home thinks you’re such a slut!
Girl #2: Piss off! At least I’m not a fire crotch!
Girl #1: Don’t you ever call me that ever again, or I’ll delete you off my Top Eight on MySpace!

–Times Square

Overheard by: Andrew

Can You Catch White?

Old black woman: Hey, you! That white woman left her purse! Take it and give it to her! What’s wrong with you? The white woman sitting next to me left her purse here — go after her and give it back!
Young guy: I have no idea what you’re talking about.
Old black woman: The white woman! She left her purse! Give it back [throws purse at him and it falls to the floor. Young guy walks away shaking his head.] What’s wrong with you people? Obviously you don’t care!

–Port Authority bus terminal

Overheard by: bri b

New York’s Most Critical Couple Savages Another Musical Event

Woman, about Hairspray: Harold, except for the finale number, I thought it wasn’t anything special. All the screaming and the jumping and the music…
Man: You’re right, Doris.
Woman: You know what was the golden era of the Broadway? The really good shows, Harold?
Man: What were they, Doris?
Woman: The Cats, The Les Mis, The Phantoms… That was the zenith, Harold. This one — I don’t know what it is.
Man: Me neither, Doris. Me neither.

–52nd St

Overheard by: izzy