Archive for 2008

Japan? Taiwan? Canada?

Woman #1: Where are you from?
Woman #2: Hong Kong.
Woman #1: What kind of Asia is that? Korea?

–N train

Headline by: Sam K.

Runners-Up:
· “And What Kind Of Alabama Are You From?” – Coyoty
· “Everywhere Like Such As and China” – Caro
· “Her Label Reads “Made in NYC Schools”” – cthonian
· “Is Our Children Learning II: The Adult Years” – Vasyl
· “Now I Fuck You Up Long Time” – Steve
· “The Oriental Kind” – alan b hutscar
· “Why Rosie O’Donnell Shouldn’t Ride the Subway” – Howard Bannister


Click here to see the new Headline Contest

Hey, Wednesday One-Liners, Cold Enough for You?

Woman on Bluetooth: How’s the weather like in your New York?

–33rd & Broadway

Old lady: Geez! Man! It is really cold here! [Looks at other lady] This is why I live in Brooklyn!

–96th & Broadway

Brit tourist to another: Eeee, I knew it were gonna be cold, but I forgot we’d have to, like, go outside.

–Central Park

Overheard by: birdw0rks

Chick on cell: Why can’t you pick me up, Dad? … I don’t want to wait for the bus — it’s too cold out… Okay, thanks. See you later. [Hangs up phone.] Asshole.

–Bronx-bound 4 train

Overheard by: Sternie

Queer hipster: It’s gonna be cold this weekend. Like, negative four or negative zero.

–Essex Restaurant, LES

Pilot: Welcome aboard our plane this afternoon, with direct service to Atlanta. The current weather in Atlanta is actually colder than it is here, so it sucks to be you.

–LaGuardia

Overheard by: jaybrrd

Wednesday One-Liners Should Be the City’s Official Animal

Bronx-born bartender: Theses mouses is gangstas up in here!

–Bar, Gramercy Park

Overheard by: Johnny Progrums

Hispanic kid in group: Gah! Not only do they have rats, but they have immigrants!

–34th St, between 7th & 8th Ave

Black queer on cell, flailing arms as rat crosses his path: Oh my god, a giant rat just went by! It was as large as a purse!

–93rd & Broadway

Woman on phone: … So they said, ‘If you found a rat, then you got a free taco…’

–92nd & Lex

Overheard by: Lost my craving for Mexican for dinner

NYU chick: Is that like a rat that masturbates?!

–Carlyle residence hall, Union Square

Overheard by: j