Archive for 2008

Ironically, the Lights Are Really Advertisements for Anti-Hallucinogens

Tween #1: Look at them lights in the sky. They look like Batman lights.
Tween #2: No, man, that's angels coming from heaven.
Tween #1: No, that's aliens coming down to interrogate us.

–President St & Franklin Ave, Prospect Heights

Overheard by: JvC

Headline by: Michael

Runners-Up:
· “But Both Were Wrong, for It Was Divine George Bush Descending From His Presidency.” – AlphaBeta

· “It Was a Street Lamp.” – Paul K.
· “Lucas and Spielberg – the Tween Years” – TV
· “Or, As People Out in the Country Call Them, “Stars”” – BabakganoosH
· “Pop Culture – 3
: Science – 0″ – The Joker

· “Robert Pattinson Gets an Unexpeected Visit After They Take the Aliens to Their Leader” – Tuesday’s Intern
· “The Anti-LSD Ads Write Themselves” – Adam B.


Click here to see the new Headline Contest

Manager: Hmmm. Sales of lace thongs, push-up bras and thigh-high stockings have quintupled recently

Interviewer #1: So, do you deal with a lot of customers on a daily basis?
Young Man: Yes.
Interviewer #2: Tell us about a situation where a customer became irate and how you handled it.
Young Man: Well, I work at Victoria's Secret so I deal with women, mostly. Sometimes, when they need something, they don't want me to help them because I am a man. I just tell them, “You're buying this for your man, so shouldn't a man help you pick out your panties?”

–Commerce Bank, 42nd & 9th