Man outside stall to presumed child: Okay champ, have you done your business in there?
Very deep voice from stall: Still working on it, thanks!
–Men's Room, Grand Central Station
Archive for March, 2009
We Have Either the Bible, Marie Claire, or a Book Of Crossword Puzzles
Sales associate #1, assisting a customer: Are there any good thrillers in paperback?
Sales associate #2: No.
–Grand Central Terminal
Overheard by: Jake E
I'll Give You Pickles 'Til It Hurts!
Raucous blond toddler, shouting: I want pickles!
Harried young mother, shouting back even louder: We have pickles at home! I will give you pickles!
–Broadway & Bleecker
Wednesday Is Gin Day.
Drunk hobo, eyeing designer bottled water: Hey lady, is that all vodka?
UES lady, without missing a beat: Not this morning.
–4 Train
Overheard by: austin
But First We Should Get High
Girl to gay guy: If you were a bird, you would totally be one that wore a tuxedo every day.
Gay guy: Lets go to the Bronx Zoo.
–45th & Lexington
Overheard by: CBro
Or, As I Like to Call It, a “Circle Of Joy”…Why Are You Laughing?
Student #1, commenting on hole in graph: Is it a black hole?
Student #2, sarcastically: No, a red hole.
Teacher, writing on brown blackboard: It's a brown hole.
(class bursts into laughter)
–Math Class, Bronx HS of Science
Overheard by: Lillian
Starbucks Needs a Numbered Menu– Just Sayin'
Customer: I'll have a skim cafe au lait.
Barista: We call it a “cafe misto” here.
Cashier: Yeah, I think “cafe au lait” is Italian.
–Starbucks
Tila Tequila Got Her Stage Name Early in Life
Young boy, about stumbling kid: What's wrong with her? What should we do?
Confident nine-year-old girl: It's okay, she just had too much tequila.
–Fordham University
Overheard by: Stunned
Your Boyfriend Lives in Queens and You Own.
Drunk black girl #1, hearing Hispanic dance song: I live in the Bronx. I hear this shit every day.
Drunk black girl #2: You live in Brooklyn.
Drunk black girl #1: My boyfriend lives in the Bronx and my rent is due.
–New Year's Eve Party, Spanish Harlem
Overheard by: Patrick
You'll Never Go Hungry in New York, Sweetie
Mother, after listening to child talking nonstop: You are so bizarre.
Six-year-old boy, seriously: I eat bugs.
–Central Park
Overheard by: Good to Know