Archive for September, 2009

Why Thorazine Is Contraindicated for Service Employees

Yankee fan: Yeah, I'll have a grilled chicken sandwich and a vanilla iced coffee.
Apathetic cashier: Crispy chicken sandwich?
Yankee fan: No, grilled, sorry about that–I thought I said grilled.
Apathetic cashier: And you wanted a Diet Coke?
Yankee fan: No, a vanilla iced coffee.
Cashier: Oh.

–McDonald's, Yankee Stadium

Overheard by: Rachel W.

Tonight's Classic Horror Movie: Slather

Ghetto girl #1: You know I look good in this outfit, but I should not have worn it today, especially after applying cocoa butter all over my ass.
Ghetto girl #2: That's why you gotta cocoa yo' ass before you go to bed at night.
Ghetto girl #1: Girl, you know I do that too.
Ghetto girl #2: Better to have too much cocoa butter on than to be a ashy hoe man like Britney Spears.

–10th Ave b/w 57th & 56th