Archive for 2009

You Can Always Tell Which Conductors Have Children

Conductor #1 on loudspeaker: Hey, Rich, can you bring my stuff into the train station once we get into Grand Central? I would, but some guy in car two won't move his big stupid dog and I can't get it past.
Conductor #2: Clifford? The big red stupid dog in your way? Alright, I got it.

–Grand Central Train

Overheard by: mq

Yet When We Insinuate That, We Get Angry Emails.

College girl: Yeah, it's “Soho,” south of Houston, and “Noho,” North of Houston. Though I guess that's kinda just the village.
College guy: That's what it means? Wow, I didn't know that! Wait, where does the other “o” come from?
College girl: Um…south, and Houston.
College guy: Oh, right. Well, I am from Jersey anyway. I don't even know nothing.

–1 Train

Overheard by: Nathan

Last Night While I Was Sleeping, They Dipped My Hand in Water!

Guy #1: I'm so tired. The monks kept me up all night.
Guy #2: What?
Guy #1: There are a bunch of Buddhist monks staying at my house.
Guy #2, laughing: What? Are you serious? Why are they there?
Guy #1: Because my mom is a political activist or something.
Guy #2: (laughs)
Guy #1: It's not even funny, it's just weird. I have all these Buddhist monks plotting a revolution in my living room!

–Stuyvesant High School