Archive for September, 2010

Can We at Least Start a Band and Affect British Accents?

Out-of-town teen hipster: I like wish one of those cars could take a picture of us crossing, so it'd be like Abbey Road
Friend: But this isn't Abbey Road, there's only three of us, and we're in the States.
Out-of-town teen hipster: So?
Friend: So it'd just be a picture of us crossing some random street! –Bowery & Bleecker

Wednesday Funbag-Liners

Teenage girl: Ohmigod. Doesn't she know that the "having big boobs" thing is, like, not in anymore? –86th St Overheard by: Kevin Girl to another: It splashed on my boob… Then he slurped it off! –Charles & 4th Overheard by: Eric 20-something guy, singing: I wanna touch some boobs. I wanna touch some boobs. I wanna touch some boobs. I wanna find my motherfucking sock, 'cause I don't know where it is. I wanna touch some boobs… –Pratt Institute Angry hobo to college chick with big boobs zipping up her jacket: Don't put them titties away! –5th & 21st Elderly woman to husband: I keep my business in my bosom! –Carnegie Deli

You Complete Me, Wednesday One-Liners

Blonde coed: After he finished yelling at me for a solid ten minutes, he's like, "So, do you want to be my girlfriend?" –3rd Ave & 11th St Overheard by: simon Middle school girl to boy: I don't normally get with sixth graders, but you're different… –10th St & 1st Ave Woman on cell: You are not listening to me. (pause) When you say whatever it is you're bitching about', I know that you are not actually listening to me. –Riverside Park Guy on cell: I don't treat you quite as bad as you say. –Amtrak Overheard by: Flooey Boyfriend, about girlfriend enthusiastically cheering on Colbert: Why don't you scream like that for me? –The Colbert Report Set Party girl to friend: So I asked my priest, and he said "I think you should see other people." –Park Ave & 29th St Overheard by: petey