Archive for 2010

Your Editors Believe We'll Have Another Drink

Conductor #1, singing: I believe I can fly. I believe I can touch the sky.
(train stops and doors don't open)
Conductor #2
: Doors! The doors!

(doors open and then don't close)
Conductor #2
: Doors!

(doors close and train starts moving)
Conductor #1, singing with backup music
: I believe I can fly. I believe I can touch the sky.


–F Train

Tonight's Movie: He's Just Not That Into Hue

Thug #1: Dude, I heard that bitch had a baby by her son, her father, and her grandfather!
Thug #2: Son, I told you not to wear burgundy!
Thug #1: What? What the hell does that have to do with it?
Thug #2: Looking like shit has everything to do with everything.
Thug #1: Well, you're wearing red…
Thug #2: That's totally different, dumbass.

–Downtown 1 Train

You Sound Exactly Like Your Mother.

Dad: If you don't behave you're going to get a spanking. Are you going to behave?
Little girl: (no response)
Dad: If you don't behave, you're going to get a spanking. Are you going to behave?
Little girl: (no response)
Dad: Well, if you decide to act like this again, then we aren't taking you to Hawaii.
Little girl: That's fine… I don't want to go to Hawaii. I hate traveling with you.

–JFK Airport

Overheard by: Jbak