Archive for November, 2011

…I Feel a Disturbance in the Force

Guy, in Star Wars' Emperor voice: Oh, I do believe the weapons on this battle station are fully operational.
Girl: That means you have an erection, doesn't it? –Atlantic Center, Brooklyn Overheard by: Jesus Jon


Hey, Being Fat Is My Performance Art!

Fat hobo to skinny homeless artist: Can you spare some change so I can get something to eat?
Skinny homeless artist: Are you fucking kidding me? –33rd St & Park Ave


The Terrorists Did Win

Guy to lady: So, there are snipers on your roof?
Lady to guy: Sigh… yeah. –45th & 3rd Ave Overheard by: Seth


Brooklyn's Notorious for Arguments About the Space-Time Continuum

Church-goer #1, from across the street: Hey! I been lookin for you!
Church-goer #2, looking puzzled: You been lookin for me? What's the matta with yo eyes? You blind? I'm right here walking towards you now! You ain't see me? –Marcy Ave & Fulton, Brooklyn Overheard by: rick


That's What You Said About the BP Spill!

Cashier #1, handing towel to coworker who just spilled soda: There ya go!
Cashier #2: Don't matter. I'm getting fucked tonight anyway. –Sbarros, Times Square


Sean Develops Eyeabetes

Student #1: Dude, she's so friggin hot.
Student #2: Aren't you married?
Student #1: Yeah, but it doesn't hurt to look. Eye candy. Yum yum yum! –New York Law School Overheard by: shaking my head at NYLS