Archive for 2011

Wednesday One-Liners, Now in 3D!

Conductor: Ladies and gentlemen, here is today's trivia question: in the movie The Wizard of Oz, what was the name of Dorothy's uncle? If you know the answer please tell the conductor. It's driving him nuts.

–F Train

Overheard by: Nick Mavro

Man on cell: Are you on 17th or 18? Okay, we'll meet in the middle. Like Benjamin Button.

–Union Square

Overheard by: Megan

Coed to friend: Girl, don't even question how many times I've seen Maid in Manhattan.

–86th & Lexington

Overheard by: Lix

Old gayguy sagely talking to really old gay guy on stoop: When A Clockwork Orange was made it was a fable. Now it's a documentary.

–Chelsea

Overheard by: Beethoven

Hobo pushing office chair down street to students waiting in long line: What is this line for? This better be for a damn good movie, with lots of sex and violence! What is this shit? Chucky gets married or something?!

–University & 8th


Wednesday One-Liners See the Big Picture

Usher to couple taking pictures: Excuse me, please. If you love Jesus, you'll stop taking pictures of the chandelier.

–Broadway Theater

Guy on cell: And the Jackie Onassis picture had laser beams for eyes!

–Central Park Reservoir

Hobo, screaming at young female tourist attempting to photograph him: Go ahead, take a picture, bitch! I'll break that shit. (looks at her companion) That yo man? I'll break him too!

–Chelsea

Overheard by: Mark P

Holidaying mum to teenager: Why do you have to do that? You ruin every freaking picture! Take a nice picture!

–6 Train

Overheard by: katherine Wallace

Teen on cell: I'm gonna take a big dump, send you a picture of it, then you can call me back.

–Bushwick


Every Real Housewives Of… Franchise: In a Nutshell.

Girl #1 to girl #2: My friend is crazy, literally crazy, like you wouldn't believe. But she's got a good heart, most people who meet her turn away, but you just gotta get to know her. And she's engaged to a gazillionaire, who's married but getting a divorce. He lives with her in a condo he got. We useta have fun, but now that she's preggers and I'm in debt we can't. Oh, but I finally paid off my Balenciaga bag!
Girl #2: Didn't you guy that bag like five years ago?

–Starbucks


…Where I Went to School.

Spanish guy to American woman in cafe: Oh, this music is so great, so sad… Do you know it? It's a fado.
American woman: Oh, that's nice, where's it from?
Spanish guy: From Portugal, have you ever been there?
American woman: No, I've never been anywhere south of Texas.

–East Village