Archive for 2011

…Your Hair Covers Your Horns Beautifully.

Southern tourist woman, drawling heavily: 'Scuse me, so to get to ground zero, I just stay on this train the whole way, right?
JAP: Yes, just go all the way to the end.
Southern tourist woman: Thank you!
JAP: Where are you two from?
Southern tourist man: We're from Mississippi.
JAP: Oh, wow! Have you been here before? Do you like it?
Southern tourist woman: It's great! We've had a lot of fun. I'm a little surprised the city isn't overrun with Jews the way we'd heard it was. We haven't run into any yet, thankfully.
JAP, taken aback: Oh… Uhm, well, I am Jewish.
Southern tourist woman, almost consoling: Oh, well… That's okay.

–E Train

Overheard by: Jewish person

I Mean, That's a Lot Of Fucking Streets

20-something girl to boyfriend, on slightly seedy block at dusk: This is East 187th Street!
Boyfriend: I have no idea what that means.

–187th St & Crescent Ave.

Mel Gibson: ” *sigh Of Relief* “

Woman on cell walking into deli: I'ma spoon her eyes out, like Charlie Sheen.
Man coming out of deli: Charlie Sheen!
Man standing waiting outside deli: Charlie Sheen, Charlie Sheen!

–40th St & Lexington

Overheard by: Unclaimed