Archive for 2011

The Paleness and Hairiness Are Also Compelling Evidence.

Teen boy: How many citizenships can you have? I want to get the Israeli citizenship, but how do I prove it?
Jewish mom: All you have to do is prove that you are Jewish.
Teen boy: How do I prove that?
Jewish mom: I took a picture of your grandma's headstone when I was in Israel, so that should work.

–L Train


Are You Coming on to Me??

Frat friend: Instead of apple and honey, what if I rang in the Jewish new year with pot and whiskey?
Asian friend: Why not an apple martini?

–Whole Foods, Houston St


On the Plus Side, They've Probably Lost Their Jobs by Now.

Girl: So then I put in a ten, and then I tried to change it to a five, but it was too late.
Guy #1, laughing: You just lost Goldman Sachs sixty million dollars! Way to go!
Guy #2: Yeah, when I worked at a hedge fund…

–Hallway, NYU Stern

Overheard by: Non-Banker Student