Why NY is not Minneapolis

Middle-aged man at the Minneapolis airport: “When Minnesota first got the lotto, they had the scratch-off lottery cards. I waited on line in a corner store, and the clerk asked me if I wanted to buy one and I said, ‘No. I do not play the lottery.’ The person behind me, as I was leaving, bought a ticket and won $1,000. The clerk turned to me and said, ‘See, you should have bought a ticket!’ and I said to her, ‘No, I’m glad I didn’t. Because I don’t play the lottery.’”

New York’s Distinctiveness

Woman waiting on line in Newark airport: “Isn’t it amazing how, whenever you go to a foreign country, you can get such a feel for the country just from the airport? Take New York: you land here, you look out the windows, and the first thing you realize about New York is, ‘aren’t the vehicles here so big!’”

Racist to English Dictionary

Customer: I rescue cats in the Bronx.
Shopgirl: You know sometimes poor families with children that aren’t taught well don’t know how to treat animals. I wish there was something that could be done about them. You know it’s not fair for the animals if they get placed into a bad home like that. If they don’t have enough money to take care of their children, how are they going to take care of an animal? And they [sic] don’t even treat their children right. –Purty Girl Boutique, Thompson St.