Female museum employee: Catnip?
Male museum employee: Yeah, catnip. It's a plant.
Female museum employee: Oh, yeah, I knew that. Just that it sounded like a snack.
Male museum employee: Yeah, right… like in “Look, a Hershey's catnip”, huh?
–The Met
Overheard by: George Carstocea
Archive for August, 2012
Depends Where You Kiss 'em, Father
20-something woman: To be honest, I have kissed so many people, I am surprised I don't have herpes.
–Fordham University
Overheard by: Ty
There's a Two-Dildo Minimum to Get Into Brenda
Girl, walking and talking with friends: And so I said to him, “if you want to have fun, you have to bring one or all of them.”
–Broadway & 8th St
Overheard by: Duncan Pflaster
…Facebook Style
Young thug kid #1: Yo, I ain't playing with you, son. I'm serious, you gonna get it!
Young thug kid #2: Nah, son. Chill, I ain't snitch on him, son. Ask Urie, he knows him better.
Urie: Nah, nigga, don't put me in this shit, nigga… but he gonna get poked.
–39th St & 47th
Hopefully We Don't Get Arrested by Homeland Security for Publishing This
Husband: You just sneezed into the air vent of the Federal Reserve. Tomorrow they're all gonna be sick.
Wife: Good! We'll kill those bastards!
–Financial District
Overheard by: chris k.
I'm Manic and She's Depressed
Wife to front desk nurse, pointing to man: Me and him, we're made for each other.
Husband: Yeah, because we're both a mess.
–Neurologist Office, Brooklyn
…You Can Spit in My Coffee Anytime
Suit to cute girl in crowded bus: What do you do for a living?
Cute girl: I'm an aspiring actress.
Suit: So, basically what you're saying is you're a full-time waitress.
–M103 Bus
Overheard by: Pretty much.
What? Too Late?
Guy hitting on woman: So where are you from?
Obviously Chinese woman: China.
Guy: Get ready for those Olympics!
–1 Train
Overheard by: LSB
Never Sleep With a Colleague, Dear Reader
Waiter #1: How are you?
Waiter #2: I'm fine as long as I don't see your face!
–Little Italy
Common Sense, Butchered
Girl #1 at butcher's: Did you know that Kobe beef is named after the famous baseball player?
Girl #2: Get out! Really? (pause) It's so cool being famous…
Butcher: Kobe Bryant is not a baseball player, and no, it's not named after him. (he explains Kobe beef)
Girl #1: Are you sure? I think you're wrong. The baseball player spells his name the same way.
–Staten Island, New York