Archive for 2012

Siri Says: “I've Found Some Wednesday One-Liners Fairly Close to You.”

Helpful guy to tourist family: You're a mile away from 42nd Street. It's twenty blocks to the south. –72nd & Broadway Overheard by: Harriet Vane Teen girl: Hey, are we still in Manhattan? –Penn Station Tourist man on cell: I'm the corner of Al-banee and Green-which… (pause) Al-banee and Green-which. –Near 9/11 Memorial Girl on cell in the middle of Central Park: Yeah, where is it? (pause) 47th and 9th? Okay, we can be there soon, we're on 76th and Madison. –Great Lawn, Central Park Overheard by: minuterie

Recreational Wednesday One-Liners

College student: I'd never done cocaine, but I was like 'I gotta get out of here!' I mean, I'm from North Carolina, you know. –46th & 8th Ave Overheard by: Evan Suit: As god is my witness on crack! –Q Train Overheard by: radkins Hobo, mumbling to himself: Shit, I just wanna buy weed, it's gonna be legal anyway. –Amsterdam & 96th Hobo, to himself: I'll get on the subway as long as I'm stoned and no one touches me. –23rd & 6th Overheard by: JS

Some Clothes-Minded Wednesday One-Liners

Gay guy on cell: I think the divorce party was probably unnecessary. (pause) And her stabbing the cake! (pause) No, I don't feel sorry for her having that drink tossed in her face! (pause) You gonna talk about my clothes when you still wear colored contacts? –St. Mark's Church Guy to friends: He set himself up for a fall because he had some big shoes to fill. I mean, they were his own shoes, but still… –37th & 8th Dad to little girl: No accessorizing until we get on the train. –Outside Penn Station Overheard by: jessica Mother to son: You shouldn't laugh; you've got dog socks on. –R Train Overheard by: Puck

Wednesday #2-Liners

Woman on cell: It was just the complete lack of compassion. Lucy was never nice to Lisa. She was never nice to Lola either. She was just a poop–well, she is a poop. –Fort Greene Park Overheard by: Morning Glory Woman on cell: Aw, yay, he pooped a lot! –Union Square Overheard by: Alannah Halliday Guy to another, talking business: I would definitely punt that dude's fucking dog and then make him eat its shit. –Greenpoint Guy on phone: Hold on, I'm picking up poop. –9th St, Brooklyn