Guy: So let me get this straight. First, you sleep with my brother, then you get pregnant, then– –LES Partially Overheard by: Matty Sallin
African pedestrian, checking out hot Asian girl: Hello.
Hot Asian girl, listening to iPod: Hi. (looks at pedestrian quizzically)
African pedestrian: Konichiwa. (smiles creepily at her)
Hot Asian girl: No inglés. (looks back at her iPod)
Overheard by: ABC
Yuppie: I don’t google enough.
–F Train, 7th Ave
Overheard by: imaginexrach
Girl on cell: Not being on Facebook is ruining my life!
Overheard by: Asian Kid
Assistant on phone, about her 17-year-old daughter’s MySpace page: I find it interesting that she and her friend Shannon have the same friend listed. Some 32-year-old guy in California named Tom!
–Office on 42nd & Madison
Overheard by: herspace
Man: I’m going to go home and e-mail some shameless bitches.
–8th St & Broadway
Grad student at computer, dolefully: Without right-click I just don’t know what to do with the world.
Overheard by: Ladle
Thug, quietly to young girlfriend: Get it, get it. (then loudly to woman about to steal the seat) Miss, she's pregnant! Miss, she's pregnant! (to girlfriend) Show her your belly. Nah, just playin, she just fat.
Woman: That's… not nice.
Woman on cell: Are you really surprised that Marcus turned out to be a serial killer?
Overheard by: shex
College dude on cell: No, the entire male species is going to die, remember?
Overheard by: glad i’m a girl.
Aviator-wearing rocker wannabe: Dude, seriously, think about it. Why aren’t there more serial killers?!
–Union Square West at 16th St
Guy: You know, I pray for the days when I find bodies…
–Lorimer St & Metropolitan Ave
Columbia newspaper reporter: Dude, you can’t just kill one person and be a serial killer. You have to work up to being a serial killer.
–Columbia Spectator Office
Overheard by: And you know from experience?
Cashier to friend: Yeah, there’s this couple that comes in every week and rents serial killer movies.
–Brooklyn Video Rental Store
Overheard by: tiff
Conductor: Thank you for riding MTA, and remember to smile. You’ll confuse the people who want to kill you!
Overheard by: Paige
Guy #1: I got a letter from Rosalyn & Jimmy Carter.
Guy #2: Oh really? How are they doing?
Guy #1: Good, they want money. –Christopher & Bleecker Overheard by: Carl
Ghetto girl #1: Raymond is gay.
Ghetto girl #2: No wonder he kisses like a bitch!
Ghetto girl #1: Maybe he don't like those rough-ass African lips…
Overheard by: wink
Metrosexual guy: If I was some fish…
Girl, not looking up from her bus schedule: Grammar just cried.
Metrosexual guy: I don’t follow you.
Girl: Good, because if you did, I would have to have you arrested.
Metrosexual guy: I am so confused.
Girl: Do the words ‘you are an idiot’ confuse you?
Metrosexual guy: I hate you.
–28th & 5th
Angry 20-something woman: The main problem is that our whole relationship is just about your dick.
30-something man, carrying loads of shopping bags: Well, it's about your pussy too.
Overheard by: itgoesandgoes
Grocery bagger: Dunno. (reaches for the produce cheat sheet)
Cashier: No, what is it?
Grocery bagger: Oh, I thought you was asking what the code for it was!
–Upscale Grocery Store, Morningside