Homeless Advocate: A penny for the homeless! A penny is all we ask. Everyone is ignoring me over a penny. Don’t laugh at me. It’s not funny. –Times Square
Protestor: I really want to get arrested. What do you think I should do? –After a protest outside Stuyvesant Church, East Village
Sidewalk solicitor, eagerly carrying clipboard: Would you please help the…
Pitch target: No spam! (walks away briskly, not looking back)
Activist: Do you have a few minutes for the environment?
Pedestrian: I don't live here.
Activist: That's okay, the environment's everywhere.
–5th Ave & 16th St
Volunteer with clipboard: Do you have a minute to help the environment?
Suit on cell: Fuck the environment, I hope the shit blows up!
–14 St b/w 5th & 6 Ave
Greenpeace guy: Hey, sign this petition!
Girl in black: No, thanks.
Greenpeace guy: It's to save the Earth!
Girl in black: Fuck the Earth.
Greenpeace guy: But what about the children?
Girl in black: Fuck the children.
–7th Ave & 25th
Overheard by: NSC
ASPCA volunteer: Hey, you have a moment for animals?
Busy man: Yeah… at lunch.
Onlooker: Ice cold!
Portly young woman browsing dress for herself, nonchalantly: Oh, this is cute, but too bad it doesn't come in fat-ass-bitch size.
20-something girl to boyfriend: Oh my god, you are so cute I just wanna punch you in the face!
–135th & 5th
Overheard by: Howzith
Middle-aged woman on cell exiting bus: You have a blessed day! (to phone) No, not you! I was talking to the bus driver–he was really cute!
Overheard by: B44 rider
Student fundraiser to passerby: Taiwan needs help! Hey, you're cute enough to help Taiwan!
Overheard by: L-Dubbs
Cute blonde to friend at gym: Oh my god! Look! That looks like a cuter version of this bald guy I slept with in a closet over the summer!
–14th & 3rd
Overheard by: Rob Lovett
Voter-pusher guy: Remember to vote this Monday!
Voter-pusher girl: It's on Tuesday!
Voter-pusher guy: Thursday! Vote on Thursday!
–23rd St & 8th Ave
Overheard by: Adam
Black dude to friend: Well, check this out my nigga! Cracking your knuckles does not lead to arthritis… Mythbusters, my nigga!
Black pimp on cell: That nigger ain't even give you a little nigga baby. All that nigga ever do is just fuck you and leave your ass, bitch. You got a child yoself, take care of your real nigga baby, because that's the nigga who keeps with you. That nigga won't fuck any other sluts. (notices everybody's staring at him) What the fuck y'all niggas lookin at?
–Social Security Office, East Village
Would-be feminist: Pussy don't have no power no more, because if it did, niggas wouldn't be doin' what they do.
–Jefferson Ave & Throop Ave, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Jocasta Spell
Polish woman, walking up to group of ghetto fabs: Yo' wut up, my niggas? (pounds fist with ghetto fab guy)
Overheard by: Kirkegaard
Crazy black man on phone: When you talk like that I'm gonna call you the N-word! (pause) Don't talk like that! (pause) I want to have sex with you.