Bitch: Oh hi! We were just speaking very poorly about you! –Art Gallery, SoHo Overheard by: Tibbie X
A cashier hands a girl her change. Girl: Excuse me, but can you give me another 20 dollar bill? This one looks counterfeit. The cashier takes the bill, examines it, and puts it back in the register. He gives her another bill. Girl: Thanks. I just didn’t want that one, you know? It didn’t have the stripe down it. It looked too new. It just didn’t look right. So don’t give it to me; just give it to the guy behind me or something. –Bagel Maven, 7th Avenue
Old lady (looking directly at Hispanic woman and her baby): They don’t speak English and they don’t wanna learn. They just want pay from America. They hate our guts.
[to baby]: Give your Mommy a kiss! –B6 Bus, Brooklyn
Woman: So I asked for a slice with mushrooms, and the girl’s like ‘Well, can you wait?’, and I’m like ‘This is New York! No, I can’t wait!’ –Association of Graphic Communications, 7th Avenue
Bitch on cell: You know what my number one pet peeve is? Intolerence! –Williamsburg Overheard by: Greg Rutter
Lady: Do you have Real Simple?
Magazine Seller: What?
Lady: Real Simple? Do you have Real Simple magazine?
Magazine Seller: What?
Lady: Real Simple! Do you have Real Simple?! –Magazine Stand, Herald Square Overheard by: Rehey
Ghetto chick: She went by and shoved me and was like “Ex-cuse me!”, but not like “excuse me”, you know? So she had this long hair? Well, I grabbed her by the hair, flung her down the stairs, and started kicking her ass. I’ll fight anybody. –D train
Chick: You know how you wanted to call him up and say it’s not personal, you just want to be friends? Don’t. They need to be told. They don’t know that they’re idiots. –Our Place, 3rd Avenue
Hipster Chick: So she’s the heiress to like–what, K-mart or some shit?–and she can’t afford to buy us all drinks? Fuck her! –D Train
Chick: I get in the cab and in five seconds Billy’s got his hands and nose pressed against the glass. And I’m like, stop that! That’s not funny. They’ll think we’re fucking tourists. They’ll take us like the longest fucking way from here. They think we’re fucking tourists. You are not excited by the Brooklyn Bridge! Or the Statue of Liberty! –Lafayette St.