Archive for the ‘Biotechs’ Category

I Need to Trade Up While I Still Have the Downpayment

Chick: My boyfriend told me that we shouldn’t keep our bank accounts together anymore. That way, when he bought the ring it would come out of his money, not our money.
Coworker: Awww, that’s sweet! What did you say?
Chick: I said that was a good idea… Which it is, because we’ll have to do it eventually when we break up. There is no way I’m gonna marry him.

–Vesey & West Side Hwy

Overheard by: On the periphery

Melissa Rivers Finally Snaps

Chick: I wish my mother was fucking dead! I wish my mother was fucking dead! I’m going to kill that bitch! I wish she would die like the whore that she is!
Smiling suit: G’mornin’!

–PATH train

Overheard by: Rick Y.

Wednesday Undie-Liners

College girl on cell: So as of last weekend I've pledged to be celibate for a year…although on second thought, it should really start today. I got pretty trashed last night and this morning I couldn't find the underwear I was wearing yesterday.

–Church St

Overheard by: Emma

20-something woman: Did you enjoy the bra fitting? Old lady grab your bits?

–Outside Town Shop

Overheard by: Wild Dog Boy

Elderly woman examining bras: What's with all this padding? I got my own damn titties!

–H&M, 5th Ave

Overheard by: titti-less

Eight-year-old in a suit jacket on cell, strutting around the store: Did you see any hot, sexy girls? Yeah, but were they hot and sexy? Where are you, man? Are you still in the underwear aisle? Yeah, but are you still by the panties? (louder) The panties!

–Barnes & Noble, Tribeca

Overheard by: emdeebee

Trashy girl walking funny: Well, I guess I should have worn underwear.

–Arthur Ave

Melinda Experiences Multi-Level Embarrassment

Guy: I have a confession to make.
Girl: Can’t you make it to me after the movie?
Guy: I can’t help it, but I took a picture of your butthole last night while you were dozing.
Girl: You what?!
Obese lady in front row: Would you queers shut the fuck up?! I’m trying to watch this shit!

–AMC Theater, 42nd St

Overheard by: Scott