Man: I can’t eat ketchup. It makes my scalp sweat. –West Village
A group of little kids are selling M&Ms on the train, perhaps to raise money for their school’s basketballing team. Homeless black dude with silver teeth enters and proceeds to yell at them. Hobo: I WANT WHAT’S IN YOUR BELLY! I WANT WHAT’S IN YOUR BELLY! –L Train Overheard by: Vickers Bastard Gringo
Woman: Something got stuck in my sinuses, then it went down my spine and had a party. –BBQ, UWS
Girl: What’s the difference between a priest and a pimple?
Girl: A pimple waits until you’re 13 before coming on your face. –Greenwich St., Financial District
Overweight woman: “I honesty think there must be a shortage of fabric or material because all shirts are baby tees and all pants are to small and low on the hips, I dont get it” – Manhattan
Guy: Lady, you got great legs.
Lady: I’m a lesbian!
Guy: Okay, you’re a lesbian who got great legs.
Lady: Oh…well, thanks. –57th & Park Overheard by: Heather
Woman upon seeing a Mariachi band walk by: Why do they have tambourines on their legs? – Manhattan
Gray-haired Man: I can get a hell of a lot more with my finger than I can with that. –East of Eighth, 23rd St. Overheard by: Megan Buckley
Girl: …And you hadda stick your damn FINGER down the toilet! –28th bet. 3rd and Lex Overheard by: Megan Buckley
Guy Clubber: Hey, Shorty!!
Girl Clubber: Ya?
Guy Clubber: I just got to tell you that you have the best forehead I’ve ever seen…but don’t get too cute.
Girl Clubber: Umm…OK? –Club NV, Soho Overheard by: Debony Miller