Archive for the ‘Bronx Science’ Category

The Story Wasn’t That Funny

Teen girl #1: Do you ever have to fart really badly in class?
Teen girl #2: Yeah, like today. I ate a PowerBar and I’ve had to shit like crazy so I keep farting.
Teen girl #1: But you can’t do it in class ’cause then it smells and people know it’s you.
Teen girl #2: You can stick dryer sheets in your pants and then it doesn’t smell as much.
Teen girl #3: But how do you keep them in there?
Teen girl #2: Well, if your pants are tight enough, where they gonna go?
Teen girl #1: Or sometimes you can ask to go to the bathroom and when you stand up your ass cheeks squeeze together and you can’t fart.
Teen girl #2: But in the two seconds before you’re standing you can’t control it, then you fart.
Teen girl #1: Damn it, I have to take a shit. –Bronx Science Overheard by: LSB

What’s in a Name, Wednesday One-liners?

Receptionist lady: Don’t you be sayin’ my whole name; I’m on America’s Most Wanted! –NewYork-Presbyterian Hospital, West 168th Street Overheard by: supermerm