Teen boy #1: Is turkey actually, like, protein?
Teen boy #2: Of course. It’s got chicken in it.
–Bronx High School of Science
Overheard by: overhearer
Archive for the ‘Bronx Science’ Category
How About a Donkey Punch?
Girl #1: It’s the last day of school and I’m not even sad. I feel like I should be crying or something.
Girl #2: Do you want me to pinch you really hard?
–Bronx High School of Science
Overheard by: Michelle
More Contagious Than Ambition, Apparently
Asian girl: Where do you want to go to college?
Greek girl: Huh, You have pink eye? My brother had that. It’s mad contagious.
–Bronx High School of Science
Except He Couldn’t Get His Blowdryer Past the Metal Detector
Guy #1 to guy #2: Those sunglasses look really good on you. They go nicely with your complexion.
Guy #3: That was an amazingly Fab Five moment.
–Bronx Science
The Story Wasn’t That Funny
Teen girl #1: Do you ever have to fart really badly in class?
Teen girl #2: Yeah, like today. I ate a PowerBar and I’ve had to shit like crazy so I keep farting.
Teen girl #1: But you can’t do it in class ’cause then it smells and people know it’s you.
Teen girl #2: You can stick dryer sheets in your pants and then it doesn’t smell as much.
Teen girl #3: But how do you keep them in there?
Teen girl #2: Well, if your pants are tight enough, where they gonna go?
Teen girl #1: Or sometimes you can ask to go to the bathroom and when you stand up your ass cheeks squeeze together and you can’t fart.
Teen girl #2: But in the two seconds before you’re standing you can’t control it, then you fart.
Teen girl #1: Damn it, I have to take a shit.
–Bronx Science
Overheard by: LSB
What’s in a Name, Wednesday One-liners?
Receptionist lady: Don’t you be sayin’ my whole name; I’m on America’s Most Wanted! –NewYork-Presbyterian Hospital, West 168th Street Overheard by: supermerm
We Never Snorted Candy at Stuyvesant
Bronx Science boy: I have pixie sticks.
Bronx Science girl: I love pixie sticks. Have you ever tried to snort them?
Bronx Science boy: Yeah, once I snorted a lot because I wanted to get high and my nose started gushing blood.
–1/9 train
Overheard by: chella