Woman: So they’re paying the kidnappers child support? I mean I know they want to support their child, but where is the money going? To those crazy people. –L train Overheard by: Kelly Marie
Tall, hot hipster brunette: I mean, when I see girls flocking around him when he's DJing I just think “oh, they are DJ whores.”
Little Asian friend: Uh-huh.
Tall, hot hipster brunette: But this girl has never seen him DJ or anything. I don't get it. It's beyond my level of comprehension.
Little Asian friend: It's okay, me too.
Tall, hot hipster brunette: It's like he has a slut whistle and we cannot hear that frequency. –Brooklyn Overheard by: muffin
Hipstress to another: At least now if you find a baby on your doorstep, you'll have a dresser drawer to put it in. –Pete's Candy Store, Brooklyn Overheard by: Mat Freimuth Gamer on headset, freaking out: Oh my god, why would you move the couch!? Why the hell did you move it, idiot!? When you move a couch, bad things happen! Move the couch… You stupid… Oh my god. Wanna know why we all died after moving the couch? Because we moved the damn couch! –Glendale Middle-aged woman backing away from pink, cushioned chair for sale: Only $199? I wonder what it would be like to fuck on that chair! –Hamilton Heights Angry wife: No, it's fine, at least I finally know how you truly feel about throw pillows. –65th St & Broadway
Hipsterette #1: I just don’t know what to do!
Hipsterette #2: Just be an artist, baby. Paint it out. Paint all your emotions out. –S 1st & Havemeyer, Williamsburg
White man: You going to church too?
Black woman: Yes.
White man: You know, I just started crying last week at service. It is so powerful.
Black woman: I know.
White man: I mean, our next President will be the last President before the Antichrist comes. Are you ready to be saved? –Foster Ave & Marlborough Rd, Brooklyn
Hipster chick: It costs like $280 to go blonde, which seems expensive but it’s totally worth it because then you’re blonde.
Overheard by: bildita
Hipster: My brother entitled all of his college essays "Heeeey Essaaaaay!"
–Smith Street & President
Overheard by: Michelle C.
(drunk or ill hipster guy lying on stairs moans pitifully and vomits)
Hipster’s friend, looking away and pretending not to know him: Ha! Fag! –7th Ave Young hipster: Let’s face it, at some point I’m gonna be homeless. –Union Square Overheard by: Conti Hipster girl: Pickles are so in right now. –Renegade Arts Festival, Williamsburg
Black chick: Yeah, I broke my sister’s knee with a baseball bat.
White chick: Wow, me and my sister had some bad fights but your’s top all our fights. You must really hate each other.
Black chick: No, I did it out of love.
White chick: What do you mean?
Black chick: My sister’s in the Army Reserve. They called her unit up to go to Iraq. I hit her on purpose so she wouldn’t have to go. I had to hit her twice to make sure her knee was broken. –Tillary Street, Downtown Brooklyn
Kid on scooter: Where are the brakes on this?
Kid on scooter #2: What is “brakes?” –Sunset Park Overheard by: blistxaddict
Waiter #1: Sit anywhere you’d like.
Guy: Thanks. Waiter #2 diverts him to a small table in an occupied section. Guy: So by “anywhere you’d like” you guys meant this exact table.
Waiter #2: Thank you. –Clark’s, Brooklyn Heights Overheard by: TG
Old lady: No, Henry, trust me. You were never a fuck machine, and I certainly did know how to fake it. –113th & Broadway Overheard by: Marc Mitchell