Archive for the ‘Buddha’ Category

Last Night While I Was Sleeping, They Dipped My Hand in Water!

Guy #1: I'm so tired. The monks kept me up all night.
Guy #2: What?
Guy #1: There are a bunch of Buddhist monks staying at my house.
Guy #2, laughing: What? Are you serious? Why are they there?
Guy #1: Because my mom is a political activist or something.
Guy #2: (laughs)
Guy #1: It's not even funny, it's just weird. I have all these Buddhist monks plotting a revolution in my living room!

–Stuyvesant High School

Least of All My Roommate's Audible Masturbation

Chick: So I e-mailed my building manager to complain about my jerk roommate, and she wrote back that the solution to all my problems is to chant. And she sent me the chant! Listen to this: “Nam yo ho ren ge cho.” And if I do this every day, I'll be happier, wiser, and in rhythm.
Dude: There are two possibilities here. Either she's enough of a flake to believe this, or she thinks you're enough of a flake to believe it.
Chick: None of this is good!

–151st & Broadway

Overheard by: Rose Fox

Wednesday One-Liners?

Girl: Is it spring that makes the cherry blossoms bloom, or the cherry blossoms that make spring bloom?

–Hunter College cafeteria

Overheard by: Traczie

Tourist chick looking at subway map: Is the Irish pub on here?

–6 train, Grand Central

Overheard by: Dee Phunk

Woman on cell, looking at directions: Numbers go up, right?

–23rd & 6th

Overheard by: V

Tourist girl: Manhattan is an island?! Is it a man-made island?

–N train

Overheard by: Sirius

Chick to friend: What religion is Buddha the king of?

–Central Park

Blonde: Why haven’t they just fixed the economy already?

–L train

Overheard by: widdershawns