Bus-driver in Vancouver: “The BC government recently did a study about fraud on the bus system, and the company they hired concluded that 3% of the riders take advantage of the system. But driving this bus every day, I see that it is really 30-40%. The newspapers say that Canadians are so good but it’s not true!”
Automated announcement: Bus operators are protected by New York state law. Assaulting a bus operator is a felony.
Guy sitting behind bus operator, loud: Hooray!
Bus operator: Scaring me is a misdemeanor.
Overheard by: Robert
Loud woman: You'd better be opening up this back door.
Driver: Yeah, well, you'd best be pushing the tape.
Bus driver to deranged-looking smelly, yelling guy: Sir, this is your stop. Will you please leave the bus now.
Smelly guy: I pay taxes!
Overheard by: richardnixon
Well-dressed British lady: Driver, what's the next stop?
Bus driver: I'm not letting you off until you pay your fare. Don't ask me again.
Overheard by: Nora
Bus driver, upon seeing a rainbow: Out the right side there is a beautiful rainbow.
Man in the back of the bus: Michael Jackson did that! He probably starting singing “over the rainbow” and God made one appear!
–Berry & N 7th
Overheard by: Bean
Woman on cell inside bus: Yeah, I'm in Kissinger Boulevard.
Bus driver: It's Kissena, hon.
Woman: I ain't talkin to you! (pause) Anyway, sorry… Kissinger. Yeah.
–Q25 Bus, Flushing
Bus driver: Everybody move to the back of the bus!
Middle school student being pushed toward the back, indignantly: Yo, I be like the young male Latino Rosa Parks!
–BX 9 Bus
Overheard by: Scheherazade
Bus driver: This bus is at capacity, so do me a favor: Move I-N, not O-U-T, and that's what she said.
Overheard by: The Average Commuter
Bus driver: Next stop is Malcolm X… No, it's not. What's his cousin's name? Oh yeah. Next stop is Frederick Douglas Boulevard.
Overheard by: polaco
Bus driver: When exiting the bus please take all of your trash with you. If you leave it on the bus you are a horrible person.
–34th St Bus
Bus driver, singing at every stop: Fifty niiiinnnth and Central Park Souuuuuthhhh. Ladies and gentlemeeeeennnn, have a wonderful daaaaayyyyyy!
Female bus driver: Everyone, squeeze in, I won't move this bus until ya'll are behind the line. Move back! Move! Squeeze! Remember to say "excuse me"! Move back! I will pull this bus over, ladies and gentlemen, move behind the line! (everyone shuffles a few inches back) It's a miracle! Thank you, Lord!
Overheard by: Erica S
Large black bus driver: Ladies and gentlemen, I see a lot of black people on here and you are going to have to move to the back of the bus, cause we got a bunch of white folk up here that gotta get on! (pause) I'm not kidding. If there were white folk back there I'd tell them to move, but it's all black folk, so you're gonna have to get over it and move to the back of the bus!
Large black woman to small white girl: You can have my seat if you want.
Small white girl: No, thanks… I'm okay.
Large black woman: I'm not gonna go Rosa Parks on you… You have a lot of shit… You can take the seat.