Archive for the ‘Cancer’ Category

Wednesday Catches a Bad Case of One-Liners

Crazy man: Now, you probably don’t know this, but most of y’all have diabetes. –1 train Overheard by: bildita Tall, skinny suit to lady suit: … What’s your sick policy? I was like, ‘Stay the fuck away from me, and don’t get me sick — that’s our sick policy!’ –13th & University Overheard by: Dave D Chick: I’da killed him if it wasn’t for that damn leukemia. –9th & Smith St station Dude: Can you get carpel tunnel of the butt? –17th & 6th Girl on cell: I’m like a virus. I never go away. I go away for a little bit, and you think you’re clear, and then I come back and take over your body. –33rd & 30th, Astoria Overheard by: brigid

Wednesday One-liners Have Their Priorities Straight

Three JHS boys pass a woman in a tight t-shirt and mini-skirt talking on her cell. One stares slack-jawed, then says to his buddies: Wow! That was the new Motorola. –79th Street between Columbus & Amsterdam Guy: As soon as I get my unemployment check, I’m going to buy a new TV. –Penn Station Woman on cell: I lost my sunglasses and I have cancer. –34th & Madison Overheard by: Lisa Boy, 8: Look Mom! I think Daddy likes the Hummer more than you. –Astoria Overheard by: Adam Kraemer Guy on pay phone: I haven’t decided if I prefer the smell of fresh urine or stale urine. I’ll let you know. –Hotel Edison, West 47th Street Guy: I told you what my goal is: to be lazy. 20 years from now, I want to be lazy. –St. Mark’s Place between 2nd & 3rd

Which One's the “Smart” Friend? Show Your Work.

Girl #1: I am just not a fan of the Jonas Brothers.
Girl #2: I don't know, the one with cancer is pretty cute.
Girl #1: What? I don't think any of them have cancer…
Girl #2: Yeah, the youngest one.
Girl #1: He doesn't have cancer, he has diabetes.
Girl #2: Oh, right! Because if he had cancer, he wouldn't have all that hair. –Washington Square Park