Archive for the ‘Cancer’ Category

There's No Pill for What Wednesday One-Liners Have

Nervous hipster: You know, it's really true what they say about friends with eczema… –50th & 8th Overheard by: chris Guy on cell: So she got cancer, big fuckin deal! –1st Ave & St. Mark's Man on cell: Next time they call, just politely say there's no one here with diabetes. –Central Park Overheard by: Lola Black Woman exiting car: There's this bump between my ass and cooch. I think I should get that checked. –W 4th St 20-something guy to 40-something woman: Look, I'm not saying I'm not concerned about my hand being sticky, but I'm more concerned about malaria. –Café

Wednesday One-Liners Are Still Waiting for Those Boy Scouts to Come Out

Hot girl on cell: You got cockblocked by cancer! (pause, then very seriously) Is your pussy still radioactive? –Upper East Side Grown man talking to grown woman: You know the sandy vagina? –32nd & 8th Street man to slutty-looking hipsters: Freeze! Drop your drawers! We've got your pussy surrounded! –2nd Ave Overheard by: Maureen 30-something woman on cell: I like to use a blowdryer on the… uh… vaginas. –D Train Girl, screaming into cell: No, I will not give you my vagina! –Bryant Park Overheard by: Can I borrow it?

Wednesday One-Glove-Liners

20-something female shopkeeper to coworker, as Michael Jackson's "Rock with You" plays on the radio: Did you hear he's sick? Apparently, he's in the hospital. I know, it's crazy. Can you imagine if he dies? If he dies, that'll be, like, the most awful thing to happen to America in years! –Pet Food Store Overheard by: Nathalie Suit on cell: What if Michael Jackson sucking your dick was the cure for cancer? –8th & Broadway Man, lighting cigarette: So what'd he die from? A sunburn? –Chambers St. & West Broadway Middle aged black lady on cell: If you can get Michael Jackson on a condom box it would definitely sell. –MacDougal & 8th St Nine-year-old boy, pointing to a newspaper article, to younger sister: Oh yeah, that guy? He was fifty. He used to be a black guy but made himself become white. –Canal & Orchard, Chinatown Overheard by: Lauren T. Large tattooed man, discussing Michael Jackson: One of those kids is his; the other two can't be, they're white. They were all unofficially inseminated, though. –Delancey & Essex