Archive for the ‘Cashiers’ Category

Wednesday One-Liners Sound Kinda Non-U

Student: Yeah, someone who plays the cello is a cellist, someone who makes art is an artist, and someone who writes poetry is a poist. –Hunter College High School Heavily accented Asian cashier to heavily accented Asian coworker: What!? Speaka English, por favor. –J2 Deli, W 18th St Overheard by: nick m Bimbo looking at scoreboard: I think the "e" stands for "exqualifications" You know, for when a player is "exqualified". –Yankees Stadium Lady: I know what I am, he ain't gonna labelize me. –Washington Square Park Real estate agent: And all the doormen and service staff are Easter European. –Park Avenue Overheard by: Looking for an apartment Ghetto college girl: I'll talk to you later, I gots to get my learn on, girl. –Brooklyn College Overheard by: Corey

Wednesday One-Liners Are Starting to Show

Aloof teen: So, other than getting robbed and coming back pregnant, how was it? –27th & 6th Overheard by: Seamus Diddy Female cashier, looking over cover of Star magazine: Girl, Angelina is having twins?! I tell you what, that girl needs to get her some birth control pills -and you know why? Because she hot and if I was Brad Pitt I would keep knockin’ her up too. –86th & 1st Girl on cell: Ugh! I can’t believe she’s pregnant again! That makes futon baby number two! –Forever 21, Union Square Girl checking SMS, to friends: Oh shit…[Reads.] "Happy non mother’s day, pass this on to all your girlfriends and women you know who survived another year of not getting pregnant." –Toys R Us Times Square Overheard by: Non Father Guy, chasing after pregnant woman in the fruit section: It’s not a boy? I swore you told me it was a boy! Honey! Come back! –Whole Foods, Bowery Overheard by: office peon