Archive for the ‘Celebrations/Parties’ Category

Could You Remind Me How to Breathe?

Hip Indian chick #1: We should totally go to Raj's party tomorrow night.
Hip Indian chick #2: Oh my god, we totally should! Except it's in Brooklyn. Like, how would we even get there? Are there like, bridges or something?
Hip Indian chick #1: You're kidding, right?
Hip Indian chick #2, laughing: Wow! I am so one of those people who are like total geniuses but always forget like, really basic stuff.
Hip Indian chick #1: Umm, yeah. Totally. –M14D Bus Overheard by: Cody

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Hillary Knows How To Host a Re-election Party

Girl #1: Remember at that party when that stripper picked up a dollar bill with her pussy lips?
Girl #2: Ohhh, yeah — that wasn’t a stripper. That was a full-on whore. –77th & 1st Overheard by: mjg Headline by: clink Runners-Up:
· “… and It Wasn’t a Dollar Bill. That Was a Full-on Penis” – Caro
· “America DOES Have Talent” – Staci Lynn
· “Because I Saw That Thing Give Change” – nicky c.
· “But We Call Her Aunt Gladys” – Mark Paul
· “I Was Just Shocked She Did It through Her Jeans.” – SAtCW
· “Kind Of Like the Difference Between Maury Povich and Springer” – alana landa
Click here to see the new Headline Contest

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I Like to Braid It Using Only My Tongue

Woman with strong Southern accent: I am gonna have her bachelorette party in my apartment next weekend.
Husband: (nods)
Woman: But the goddamn stripper won't return my phone calls.
(waitress brings shots)
Woman: What is this?
Waitress: Tequila, on us.
Woman: This'll put hair on my boobies.
Husband's friends: That's just how he likes it.
Husband: (nods) –Brother Jimmy's BBQ, Upper West Side

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Wednesday One-Liners: “Toga! Toga! Toga!”

60-something white woman: They put on a good show. Those Jesuits really know how to party! –Penn Station Overheard by: Jeff Gay man to others, about parties: Yeah, I thought about going to the black party, but I'm not that gay! –7th Ave & 6th St Overheard by: NottRob Young woman: I'm twenty-seven. I've never been to a party, a sexy party, where I don't remember who I've slept with. –21st St & Lexington Overheard by: Jonas Chick on cell: I can't. It's my cousin's chihuahua's birthday party. –28th St & Lexington Overheard by: sounds like a rager

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