20-something (to boyfriend): Janet said that no boyfriends were invited to her party. But she then made exceptions, for different reasons, for the boyfriends of every other girl who is invited to the party who has a boyfriend. Except for you. So I’m worried that she may not like you. –F train
Drunk Skank #1: …cause that’s what we’re celebrating.
Drunk Skank #2: What’re we celebrating?
Drunk Skank #1: The Bush/Cheney thing.
Drunk Skank #2: Oh yeah! –49th and Broadway Overheard by: Anne C.
Girl: The party is out in Brooklyn? Are you kidding me? I swear you need a passport to get out there. –UES
Dude #1: That party was fun. It was hot, though.
Dude #2: Yeah, it smelled like hot ass in there. –Loews Hotel, Lexington & 51st Guy: Yo, she smelled like dead hell! –Flatbush
Grandmother reading newspaper: Oh, it's grandparents' day tomorrow!
Grandfather: It can't be. That's in February, I think.
Grandmother: It says it right here.
Grandfather: But it has to be in winter, because he has to see his shadow!
Overheard by: Daniel
Loud 20-something man: Jesus! Hallelujah! Praise the lawwwddd!
Friend: Will you please be quiet?
Loud 20-something man: Hallelujah! Let's get some vegetarian curry!
–E Houston & Ave A
College girl #1: I want to go trick or treating now…
College girl #2: Yeah, totally.
College girl #1: I don't think anyone would give us candy though… We'd just get raped.
–Party City, 14th St & 5th Ave
Older musician in nice suit: It's Halloween! Hell, every day is a Halloween!
Friend: That explains a lot about you.
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: stavka
Girl #1: I used to wear a cross, but then one time somebody was like, “you cant wear a cross–you drink!
Girl #2: Did you tell them that Jesus drank?
Girl #1: I should have! Jesus was so down to party!
Girl #2: Bitch, if you turn water into wine, you are the party.
Seven-year old boy to bookseller: Do you have any books on crop circles in this library?
–Barnes & Noble
Overheard by: Amused bookseller a few feet away
Man to another: Don't you know? All those tunnels in Afghanistan run into the pyramids in Gaza! If I was President there would be one less pyramid.
–Soup Kitchen, Midtown
Overheard by: John Gordon
Gentleman on train: You know why they invented daylight savings, don't you? It's because of Halloween, a lot of congressmen wanted kids to have an extra hour to go trick or treating. That's why we have daylight savings.
Overheard by: Annie
Elderly professor: Fewer chairs, less chalk every week. It's a conspiracy!
Overheard by: Denali