Tourist chick: Of course he doesn’t speak English…at least until you piss on his floor. –Chinatown
Tourist chick #1: You have to go uptown in order to go downtown to Chinatown.
Tourist chick #2: And I thought this was a non-stop… –6 Train
Arab man: Did you dance at your wedding?
Marine: I prefer not to think back at that point in my life. –Casa Bella, Mulberry St.
Diner: Your brown sauce; it’s some sort of, um…brown sauce?
Dining Man: OK, that sounds good. –Pongsri, Chinatown Overheard by: Joseph Schoech
Kid on cell: So I rubbed it really hard and really fast… and I made her throw up.
–Marble Hill High School
Drinker to friend, while playing flip cup: I will throw up in your pussy wagon.
–Whiskey Tavern, Chinatown
Woman: I'm really glad it wasn't the Prozac making her throw up… just her other meds.
–33rd St & Park Ave
Girl: My uterus is vomiting!
–Bard High School, Queens
Overheard by: Sunny
Girl on cell, looking up: I don't know, nigga! I'm standin' in fronna some ancient castle or some shit.
–Wall St & William St
Southern guy on cell: No, seriously, there's shade on the side of the streets here! (pause) No… No, I know. (pause) I'm sitting on a bench, outside, in the shade!
Locationally-challenged woman on cell: I'm on the street, kinda near Blockbuster?
–Blockbuster, Broadway & 9th
Girl on cell: I'm not sure where I am, everything is Asian.
Middle-aged woman on cell: We're in Soho, and he has a three-legged dog.
–Bowery & Spring
Overheard by: Kaze
Girl: Listen to me!
Asian emo boy: What?
Girl: This is what you need to do with your girlfriend so you can fuck her better!
White college student to Korean friend: Dude, I thought Asian-ness was like… universal!
Korean student, irritably: I hate seeing all these sneaky chinks around.
Overheard by: Someone who can tell Koreans from Chinese…
Tourist woman to husband: Is it all vegetarian?
Guy waiting in doorway: Uh… Yeah.
Tourist woman: Oh. That makes sense.
–Outside Vegeterian Dim Sum, Chinatown
Overheard by: Brok
Little boy to father, watching NYPD officers standing outside on horseback: Shit, yo! The cops is here!
–W 42nd St
Overheard by: Nikki
Loudspeaker on police car to pedestrians: We have sidewalks in New York. Try using them!
NYC cop to pushy tourist: Don't touch me, I have no answers for you.
Man to cop: When are you gonna learn that, man? People suck!
–Grand Central Station
Cop on horseback to pedestrian horse admirer: Don't get any closer to the horse, unless you want rabies.
–3rd St & Thompson
Overheard by: Heather