Archive for the ‘Cleanliness’ Category

Wednesdays Brush After Every One-Liner

Big, Italian guy on cell: Braces? (pause) Why do you want braces? (pause) You don't just get them 'cause you want them! –Penn Station Overheard by: I hated braces 30-something woman to friend: I started getting cavities after I started making out with boys. –Queens Overheard by: Angela Drunk guy: I wasn't having a heart attack, I was at the dentist! –M60 Bus Happy tall man on cell: Alright, nigga, brush your teef and all that, I wanna get high! –111th & Lenox Ave

Ew, Who Wednesday One-Linered?

Elderly janitor, watching pierced teenagers get in line: I'm gonna fart on one of these people. –Broadway & Houston Angry man on cell: They think they're so perfect, but I bet they piss and burp and fart like the rest of us. –80th St & 34th Ave Hobo: Can you spare some change? I need to buy some new underwear, I farted and shat in these. –83rd St & Broadway Overheard by: new girl in town Tiny brunette: Have you ever had to pee so bad, and suddenly you fart and then you don't have to pee that badly anymore? –7 Train Young woman to friend: Yeah, and then she started fartin' a bunch. But she was farting out of her pussy. And Ashley got pissed, cause then, she started makin' a beat out of it. –125th St & Lexington Overheard by: Stephen